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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28401879">who ever loved that loved not at first sight?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuwaesthetic/pseuds/fuwaesthetic'>fuwaesthetic</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Check the notes at the beginning, M/M, band/fan au, this is written solely in leo third person because i love him</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 16:15:35</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,054</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28401879</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuwaesthetic/pseuds/fuwaesthetic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“I think I'm gonna write him a love song,” he tells Ritsu, and he tells Izumi it, too, for good measure. Two days later, they've tied him to his only dining room chair with a really nice sweater Ruka got him for Christmas last year.</p><p>[ or ]</p><p>leo finds his inspiration in the blond vocalist of an underground band named bad boys, and a hell of a lot more than that, too. (ensemble stars gift exchange 2020)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Nito Nazuna/Tsukinaga Leo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>who ever loved that loved not at first sight?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>cw: technical self-harm, albeit not on purpose. // ritsu and izumi have mouths; leo's a little stream of conscious; nazuna's doing his best! implied past eileo.</p><p>for <a href="https://twitter.com/skypirates_">rui</a>! THANK YOU FOR THE LOVELY PROMPT... I'M SORRY THIS FIC WENT A LITTLE OFF THE RAILS? i hope you enjoy it, and happy holidays!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Getting out'll be good for you,” Ritsu says, peeking through the crack in the door. He's surprisingly strong for someone who continuously insists he's never lifted anything heavier than a chopstick in his entire life, and Leo grits his teeth as he pushes harder on the door, trying to close it. It doesn't budge – what the hell, honestly! Did he manage to trick someone else into helping him out? He bet he did, Ritsu's so wily like that – “You listenin', Tsukipi?”</p><p>“Not one bit!” Leo replies, giving the door another shove. It moves a few centimeters – ground which is quickly lost as Ritsu – or his helper – pushes the door right back where it was. “Augh – Rittsu, what the hell! Where'd all this energy come from, huh? What happened to just ditchin' me and letting nature take its natural course! Or should it be <em>who</em> the hell, huh!? You're not Rittsu, are you! You're an impostor –”</p><p>Ritsu chuckles lowly, stepping just out of view. “I fucking <em>wish</em>.”</p><p>The door slams open, and Leo squawks as him and Ritsu both go tumbling into the mess of his apartment. He groans gently, head pounding from meeting the floor – well, everything hurts from that, but his head especially! – and he gingerly opens his eyes. Ritsu's predictably fared better: he's already sitting up, rubbing his shoulder with a grimace. Leo scowls at him, but that's about as far as he gets – trying to straighten himself out just makes the world spin like he's ten again, sitting on the carousel with Ruka and telling her all kinds of tales about the ceramic ponies taking off into the air on their own, going faster and faster until they break into the next world.</p><p>He'd been a pretty creative kid.</p><p>Too bad he can't find that well of inspiration <em>now.</em> He groans at himself, shaking his head slowly when Ritsu tries to help him up.</p><p>“I'm good, I'm good. I just need a sec.” He lays his arms over his eyes with a sigh, trying to relax in the warm darkness that accompanies the gentle weight of them. “...You hate going out, Rittsu. You hate doing <em>anything.</em> Why're you bothering me so much?”</p><p>Ritsu sighs from beside him – ah, come to think of it, there's nothing heavy on him anymore – and Leo feels his leg press against his shoulder a moment later. Ritsu's hands brush through his hair gently, and he replies almost too softly for him to hear over the angry buzzing of the fluorescent lights: “Because I'm worried about you.”</p><p>Leo's words fail him, and he lets Ritsu shuffle him into the washroom to get cleaned up.</p><p>The livehouse is filled to the brim with people; they almost can't get a good view of the stage, but Izumi manages to get them right up front. Ritsu's a comforting presence at his side, their arms looped together and his head resting against his shoulder as they wait for the show to start. The weight is easier to focus on than the fact he's outside his apartment for the first time in seven months; it's easier to think about how nice Ritsu smells today, or how many fingers he can see with their hands next to each other like this, than how everyone probably recognizes him and they're probably all talking about him and how his songs have been flopping recently and how he hasn't written anything good in forever and he's a failure of a composer and how he should just drop d</p><p>“Leo-kun,” Izumi hisses beside him. “Stop fidgeting. We seriously don't have enough room for you to do that here, okay?”</p><p>“Sorry, Sena,” Leo replies, and he means it, too. He watches Izumi's lips twist from the corner of his eye, and he feels guilty for causing such a horrible, wretched expression on such a beautiful face; he starts to apologize again, for his existence and for making them drag him out here and for ruining his pretty looks, but the lights in the livehouse go out, and the crowd's noise ebbs into silence.</p><p>There are three bands playing tonight, he remembers Ritsu saying on the way here – one of them has a guy he knew when they were kids, or something like that, which is how he got tickets in the first place – but only the last band catches <em>his</em> attention.</p><p>More specifically, the vocalist does. His cute looks and bright voice don't match the song they play at all, but it <em>works</em>, and his fingers itch for a pen. Paper is secondary – no, tertiary – no, whatever fourth, fifth, sixth place is! A <em>pen</em> is most important, and he digs through Izumi's pockets (much to his disgruntlement) until he finds one.</p><p>It isn't a good song. It's painful, actually, the pen digging into his skin as he scores a score across it, the melody in his head deafening the room around him, and he only realizes he's drawn blood when his notes start to smear. He whines piteously, catching Ritsu's attention, and it takes only a few moments for Izumi to catch his wrist and drag him to the restrooms. Ritsu slinks after, and Leo sighs as he shoves his arm under the sink.</p><p>His melody, being washed away just like that. Izumi's growling something at him, but it's as mute to him as the rest of the world; nothing is more important that the red that matches that vocalist's eyes running down his arm, or the way the water turns rosy pink like love as it spills over his forearm. He recognizes when Izumi stops yelling though, mostly because he's moved away; his reflection in the mirror runs its hand over its face with a sigh, and it's shaking. Leo's reflection frowns, and Ritsu's reflection rests heavy on his shoulder.</p><p>He doesn't hear him, either, but he shakes his head at whatever question the reflection poses at him anyway, and maybe that's good enough because once he's cleaned up and the song in his head has settled, they're back squeezed among the crowd. At least there's less of a crowd now, but there's still too many people – but Leo finds he doesn't care about them anymore, or not that much, anyway. Maybe accidentally hurting himself broke part of him.</p><p>Maybe it's because that bright-eyed cutie is standing at the door, thanking people for coming to see them. There's vocalists and whatevers from the other bands too – Ritsu, after a small word with Izumi, darts off to tackle one of them against the wall like a cat finding an old favored toy – but Leo only sees Blondie.</p><p>Izumi barely keeps up with him, swearing as they push through everyone else, and Leo grips Blondie's hands when they're extended for a simple handshake.</p><p>“I'm Leo!” His voice feels too soft, but he knows he's yelling – he can tell by the way the young man looks taken aback, his smile nearly startled away. “I love your voice! I love you! Let me write a song for you, whoever you are!”</p><p>“Uh,” the young man replies, and if he says anything else Leo doesn't hear it, because Izumi shoves him out into the freezing December night and doesn't let his shoulders go until they're standing in front of <em>his</em> apartment. Leo's sure that Izumi would've kept holding onto him if he hadn't had to look for his keys, and he weighs the chances of escaping successfully versus Izumi's anger versus the probability of finding his way back to the livehouse as he waits for the door to open. He thinks about them a little more when he's ushered in and onto the couch, and he thinks about blond hair and red eyes and the way Blondie had turned pink the split seconds before their connection had been broken.</p><p>He pulls the blanket Izumi lays on him over his head and turns on his phone, determined not to sleep before he discovers his muse's name.</p><p>He, regrettably, does so anyway.</p><p>“Your cereal's getting soggy,” Ritsu points out from beside him, but Leo ignores him, still thumbing through livehouses. Which one had been the one they were at? And why the hell were there <em>so many in this area.</em> “Secchan's gonna bitch at you if you don't eat.”</p><p>“Bad Boys!” Leo jumps out of his seat, holding his phone above his head. “Yes! That's them, right!? The last band from last night! Yeah, that's Blondie – ah, his name's Nazuna, huh? That's too many syllables! Hey, Rittsu –”</p><p>“His fans call him Nazu. Anyway,” he taps Leo's bowl with his spoon, his head pillowed on his arm, “you better eat before Secchan gets out of the washroom. At least a little bit.” He pauses, and then asks, “What's got you all fired up?”</p><p>“Nazu.” Leo sinks in his seat, staring at the cupboards opposite of him. “He's cute and his voice is <em>great</em>, and the rest of that band isn't that bad either but they'd be <em>nothing</em> without him, and I wanna...”</p><p>He pauses, listening to the washroom's faucet shut off, and sits up; he wheezes as his chest hits the table, but he manages to shovel in three whole bites of disgustingly soft and soggy cereal into his mouth before Izumi steps out, still rubbing lotion on his hands. Izumi makes a face at him – ah, maybe he didn't get all of it <em>into</em> his mouth.</p><p>Whoops.</p><p>With Ritsu's help, he manages to score tickets to their next show – and the one after that – and the one after <em>that</em>, and every time he hears Nazuna's voice his fingers itch and he reaches for his pocket. Writing music on his arm only goes so far, and after the first time where he'd been forced to watch it go all down the drain – well, Ritsu'd been nice enough to gift him a little notebook and a miniature pen to match. He scribbles notes between sets and when other bands are on stage, before shows and after them, at home when he finds recordings of their shows uploaded on the internet...</p><p>He hasn't felt like this since –</p><p>Meeting Nazuna is harder though. It isn't like there's backstage passes or anything like that, and the crowd moves too fast for him to really get any alone time with him, and most of the time he's left sitting outside with Ritsu, watching his breath dissipate in the winter air. Mao always comes out a few minutes later, and Ritsu taps Leo's shoulder, and the three of them head off; they drop Leo off at his apartment, and he watches from the third floor's railing as Ritsu clings to the part of him he's sure he'll never really know.</p><p>And yes: meeting Nazuna is harder, but it isn't <em>impossible</em>. It just takes fifty reassurances that he'll be fine, he has his phone, and he had Izumi input his apartment's address into Google so he can find his way home on his own. Ritsu frowns at him, and it's such a cute expression on him – his eyebrows crease, worry at the edges of his eyes, and Leo thinks life would've been much easier if Ritsu had ever been his muse, either now or in the past.</p><p>But he isn't, and after too many words, Ritsu and Mao leave him standing relative darkness. He stands until his legs cramp, and then he sits, watching the neon lights outside of the side-street cast their bright, colorful glow on the few people walking around this late; when he tires of that, he leans back against the livehouse's wall and closes his eyes, envisioning strings and drums and synthetic keyboards. He doesn't know when he falls asleep – he only knows that when he wakes up, it's to his hands being too cold to move, much less hold a pen, which is a shame because Nazuna is <em>right there,</em> concern as plain to see on his face as the tiger make-up he had painted on Izumi as a prank four years ago when the other had slept over at his house for the first time.</p><p>(He hadn't slept over ever again. Leo's pretty sure that's because he's a poor sport.)</p><p>“Are you okay,” Nazuna <em>tries</em> to ask, or that's what Leo thinks he must be asking – he doesn't know, because he's more focused on grabbing him before he disappears like some sort of Christmas ghost; he isn't even sure that Nazuna's not just some like, crazy cold hallucination, not until he feels how solid and warm he is. His surprised yelp registers faintly in the back of his mind, and Leo lets go of him with a laugh, raising his hands.</p><p>“Sorry! I was just making sure you were real and not just a figment of my imagination again!”</p><p>“Again,” Nazuna says after a moment, sounding it out, and Leo nods. “What do you mean by that –”</p><p>“Doesn't matter! Not important! Hey, Nazu – you remember me, right? I wanted to write a song for you! I wrote tons of them, actually, but I don't have them on me right now.” Which is a shame; Nazuna probably would've liked at least <em>one of them.</em> He's a genius composer, after all. Leo grins at him, balling his fists in his lap.</p><p>The silence lasts a little longer than he's comfortable with, and he almost starts fidgeting and apologizing before Nazuna stands up and asks if he wants to talk about this over drinks.</p><p>Technically, he's not allowed to drink alcohol – Izumi's rules – so he gets water, while Nazuna sips at the bar's cheapest beer. At least the quiet here isn't <em>quiet</em> quiet, with the chatter of other patrons filling the space between them. They're noisy, terrible sounds, but it makes Nazuna's voice all the sweeter when he finally clears his throat and leans forward.</p><p>“You wanted to write a song for me?”</p><p>“Yep! Oh! I'm Leo – I'm a composer!”</p><p>“I've never heard of you.” Nazuna's nose wrinkles (cutely) as he sips his drink again, but he doesn't seem turned off by the offer, or by him. That's nice. <em>Take that, Sena.</em> “Why? I mean, why do you want to write a song for me?”</p><p>“I just do! Like –”</p><p>It's hard to figure out how to put it into words that other people will understand. It always has been, and Leo hums, swaying from side to side.</p><p>“...I just want to,” he finally concludes. “I couldn't help but write a whole lot of them after I heard you sing the other month, and I keep writing them, too! Your voice is super pretty, Nazu! And you're cute too! It just really gets my creative juices going!”</p><p>“So I'm your inspiration?”</p><p>“Yep!”</p><p>Nazuna takes a long drink of his beer, eyes closing, before he sets it down, sighs, and tells him he'd love to see them.</p><p>“I can't accept anything without discussing it with the guys first,” he says at Leo's apartment door, “but if you bring them to our next show, I'll make sure they get a chance to look at them too.”</p><p>It's probably the best answer he's going to get right now, even though every cell in his body is itching for him to demand a better one, so he just nods quickly and ducks inside before they can escape his puny human form and riot until they get one they're satisfied with.</p><p>Asking to write a song for him isn't the weirdest way Nazuna's ever been propositioned before, Leo discovers. His bandmates are more than happy to fill him in on the rest of his proposals when he meets them – apparently he's impressed them with his bold moves, so suck on those toes,<em> Sena</em> – and the anecdote about someone jumping two stories after just seeing Nazuna's face has him laughing and thinking about what a <em>mood</em> that is. Leo watches Nazuna as he pores over the sheets of music, straining his ears to hear them brought to life through humming, snatches of singing, <em>anything at all</em>.</p><p>Nazuna remains quiet and focused, and Leo's heart beats without a sound in his hollowed-out chest.</p><p>“We talked about them,” he says later (over a Sunday morning brunch, the smell of coffee almost too much for his overstimulated brain), “and they're amazing, Leo-san, but we don't think they really fit our band's theme.”</p><p>“That's because they're not for your band! They're for you! Nazu! I wrote 'em all 'coz of you, so they're for you to sing! I can make the music,” he waves the start of the retort off firmly, “so you just have to sing it!”</p><p>“I'm not a solo act,” Nazuna tries again, and Leo frowns a little. No, he guesses he isn't. “I'm the only one who sings, sure, but we all put everything into this. I couldn't leave them out.”</p><p>“Then I'll just make one that only you can sing, but your band can play.”</p><p>“You say that like it's <em>easy</em>,” he murmurs, and Leo's sure he's not supposed to hear it, but his ears are tuned as fine as a grand piano at the Sakuma estate. Nazuna sighs, his shoulders falling with the motion, and in a louder voice he replies, “All right. I'll let the guys know, so... Just let me know when it's done, okay?”</p><p>Leo's head swims from how much he nods, and when he gets home, he crashes straight onto his couch.</p><p>It's more difficult to write for people he doesn't really care about, who don't really inspire him the same way Nazuna does, but they're people that Nazuna found worthwhile to devote his time to – so that has to mean <em>something</em>, and when he wakes up somewhere around one in the morning, he starts on his investigation. The members individually really aren't anything special – he's sure he could find any of them anywhere, easy – but their band had been formed out of their high school's light music club, and they'd been friends even before that, so their bond's actually pretty strong and they have great chemistry and –</p><p>Ritsu, bless his heart, listens to him chatter on and on at three in the morning, making noises every so often to let him know he's still awake and still listening. Not that Leo thought he <em>wouldn't</em> be awake – out of the three of them, Ritsu's definitely the most likely to be up at this godforsaken hour – but there's a difference between being awake and listening, and being awake and <em>not</em> listening.</p><p>“You think you can write somethin' for 'em then?” He asks once Leo's grown quiet, and Leo thinks about it.</p><p>He really thinks about it, and finally he growls, throwing himself off the couch and onto the floor. Ritsu makes a startled noise, and Leo stares at the wall with a growing sense of displeasure.</p><p>“No,” he replies, the word sour on his tongue and sourer still on his stomach, “I can't. It's just Nazu.”</p><p>He tries anyway, and it isn't a song he likes, but it's one they're happy with. Nazuna grins brightly at him, reading over it with his three bandmates, and Leo's heart does a funny little dance he thinks belongs to the Alps but could very well be some sort of Russian folk thing instead with the way it bounces and shakes. He thinks he'd write a hundred symphonies to see that look again, and he does, shilling out song after song without asking for recompense.</p><p>Izumi yells at him for it. Ritsu doesn't, but the look he starts to wear is caught somewhere between concern and frustration.</p><p>Leo doesn't care. He gets to talk to Nazuna, and he gets to write for Nazuna, and sometimes Nazuna talks to him first. Actually, a lot of the time he does, even if it's just little things, and Leo knows. He <em>knows</em> he knows better, and his heart is still aching from the last time he fell in love with someone, but Nazuna is so kind and warm and caring; he's nagging without being too overbearing, and he's cute and easy to tease, and he has hopes and dreams that extend far, far into the future.</p><p>The worst of it is this: he is so <em>genuine</em> about it all that it makes Leo's heart ache all the more, and he can't tell if that's from yearning, or if it's the reminder he's carried with him all these months that some fires burn too hot for humans to hold in their hands. He doesn't think Nazuna is one of those though,</p><p>(but Eichi hadn't seemed that way, either, and look where they were now)</p><p>and he turns the volume up on his laptop as loud as he can handle in his headphones, ignoring the barbed words that sit in wait in the shallow pool of his mind.</p><p>He feels like Captain Hook, jumping at the gentle tick-tock, tick-tock of his own imaginary pocket-watch.</p><p>“I think I'm gonna write him a love song,” he tells Ritsu, and he tells Izumi it, too, for good measure. Two days later, they've tied him to his only dining room chair with a really nice sweater Ruka got him for Christmas last year.</p><p>Izumi sighs, hip cocked in his peripheral. Leo understands the feeling. He, too, is extremely tired, though he's pretty sure their points of exhaustion come from two wildly different sources.</p><p>“Didn't you <em>learn anything?</em>”</p><p>“Secchan,” Ritsu says, voice low and tense.</p><p>Izumi ignores him, jamming a finger into Leo's chest. “Well? Like, seriously, Leo-kun. You barely know the guy, and you're gonna write him a love song? Just like you did Tenshouin?”</p><p>Leo flinches at the name – he doesn't like hearing it from his head, and he likes it even less from Izumi's mouth, even when that mouth softens into a firm line instead of a scowl, and the disapproving look diminishes just a little from clear blue eyes. He glances away when Izumi heaves another sigh, and he hears him step away, across the small area he proudly calls his kitchen-dining-thingamaroom.</p><p>Ritsu takes his place, dropping to his knees so he can pillow his head with his arms on the table.</p><p>“He's just worried about you. You know how Secchan is.”</p><p>“A big stupid meaniehead who doesn't know how to use his words right.”</p><p>“Yep, yep.” Ritsu's smile is slow, but it isn't as contagious as usual. Leo tries not to think about why that is. “He's a big stupid meaniehead who doesn't know how to use his words right.”</p><p>“Shut the fuck up, Kuma-kun.”</p><p>“He didn't tell you to shut up,” Ritsu whispers, leaning closer, “so he probably knows he deserved it, at least from you.”</p><p>Leo gives one short nod, and Ritsu shifts back a bit again.</p><p>“Let's take it from the top, Tsukipi. You wanna write it for him to sing, or as a confession?”</p><p>“Both.” Leo draws his knees up to his chest as best he can, laying his cheek on one as he gazes at Ritsu. “I wanna write it for him to sing and then like, when he's singing it it'll hit him like bam! It's a confession! A real love song!”</p><p>“It'll mean more if you sing it for him.” Ritsu taps his fingers on the fake wood of his one-person dining table, the way he would playing a nocturne on the piano. “Write it for him, and write it to be sung by him, but when he says he doesn't know if it'll fit their sound, offer to sing it and show him that it will.”</p><p>“Rittsu,” Leo breathes, “you're a <em>genius.</em>”</p><p>“He's not,” Izumi replies, but Ritsu grins anyway, and Leo laughs.</p><p>(The three of them stay up that night – Izumi to chaperon, despite his complaints that his skin will get ruined; Ritsu to mind the electronic keyboard, helping to pick out the perfect sounds and work through the hard parts.)</p><p>Ritsu is as good as read on people as ever. Just as he says, Nazuna reads over it with laser-guided focus, and when he smiles, it's happy but apologetic.</p><p>“Leo-chin,” (his heart bounces at the nickname, as it had every time Nazuna had spoken it into being starting a mere two months ago,) “I don't know think this'll fit us... You wrote it with me in mind again, didn't you?”</p><p>“Yes and no! Sort of! You'll see! Hold on, I'll sing it for you!”</p><p>“You don't have to –”</p><p>But he <em>does </em>have to, and the object of his undying affection will understand that in just a moment. Leo snatches the music from the table, dancing away when Nazuna wheezes and reaches after it, and he takes a deep breath and <em>sings.</em></p><p>He doesn't know how long he holds every note; he doesn't know how long he's been standing on a chair, not even looking at the song (why would he ever need to? he <em>wrote it</em>), his hand over his heart. It feels a little romantic, a little noble, but he realizes it's a defense mechanism as soon as the last word soars from his mouth, the song ending in a ballet dancer's pirouette. It's to keep his heart from bursting from his chest; it's to keep knives from digging in and carving it out again. Leo catches his breath in the warm air, and he can't look at Nazuna directly – his heart won't allow him. He looks at the spot to the left of him, devoid of people but full of empty seats, and he waits.</p><p>Nazuna claps for him, and Leo does his very best not to collapse into the chair beneath him. All things considered, he thinks he does a good job of that – only one of his legs slips when he's getting down to sit properly, and it doesn't even hurt that much in the aftermath. Nazuna moves tables to sit across from him again, his movements careful, and his face is a shade fast approaching the red of his eyes.</p><p>“What'd you think?” Leo asks, because Nazuna hasn't said anything yet. Nazuna laughs in a short burst, raising his hands to rubs his cheeks as if that'll stop them from being red. It still isn't an acceptance or a reciprocation though, and the longer Nazuna goes without saying either makes his heart flutter less and less like a happy little songbird and more and more like a canary trapped in a coal mine, and he grips his chair tightly. “Wait, wait, don't tell me! I'll imagine it, okay? You –”</p><p>“You can't imagine other people's feelings,” Nazuna interrupts him, and Leo's body continues to try and decide if this is a flight situation or a sit tight situation. “Geez, Leo-chin... You really surprised me there. You're good at everything, aren't you?”</p><p>“Not everything! I'm bad with directions.”</p><p>Nazuna laughs again. Leo decides he has a love-hate relationship with it – he loves the sound, and he hates how it makes him feel at this very second.</p><p>“The song, Nazu!”</p><p>“Right.” Nazuna laughs again, just a little, on the edge of a breath. “The song... Leo-chin, that's a love song, right?”</p><p>Leo nods. Nazuna nods too, licking his lips idly.</p><p>“Is it for me? I mean –” His face scrunches, and he shakes his head. “<em>For</em> me, not just for me?”</p><p>It all sounds the same to him, to be honest, but Leo thinks he gets what Nazuna means, and his nails dig into his legs as he nods again. He feels more nervous than excited now, and that's a terrible feeling to have, even as it gives way to relief as Nazuna picks up the song once more and mouths the words to himself, his smile crinkling at the corners of his eyes.</p><p>“I love you,” Leo says once he's got Nazuna's attention again, the three words skittering out like a car hitting a patch of black ice.</p><p>The rest of his words do too, a twenty-car pile-up on the busiest road in Japan.</p><p>“I love you so much, Nazu! You're fun to be around and you're super reliable and you never make me feel stupid for having questions, and you always listen to me talk about really weird things and don't complain, and you even went alien hunting with me! No one <em>ever</em> goes alien hunting with me, not even Rittsu, and Rittsu does almost <em>everything</em> with me! Whenever I'm with you, too, it's like, my heart's gonna burst with a big <em>boom</em>, and then I'll be dead! But not like forever, you know? Your smile could wake the dead, but like, in a <em>good way</em>, like it's the light that brings them back!”</p><p>Wait, going towards the light meant permanent death, didn't it? – Leo shakes the thought out, his mouth still running as Nazuna's slowly opens.</p><p>“You're so kind and sweet and cute, and even the really petty, childish side of you's super good! Actually, when it's kinda hot when you get all vindictive! Like <em>woah, Nazu! Really living up to that Bad Boys name, aren't you!</em> Kind of thing!”</p><p>“Leo-<em>chiiiiin</em>,” Nazuna whines, flushed from the roots of his hair down beneath his shirt. “Don't say that kind of stuff in public! At least not so loudly! There's kids here!”</p><p>“Not <em>here</em>-here,” Leo retorts, but he settles back down, and his fingers perform a drumline on the chair beneath him. “So? Nazu? Answer?”</p><p>“I like you too.” The reply is quiet, but the strained kind of quiet, not the soft kind. “I don't think I've ever met anyone else like you in the entire world, Leo-chin. There's not a single dull moment when I'm with you, and as exhausting as that can be sometimes, I love it.”</p><p>It's the answer he wanted, but he hadn't expected it, exactly – so his heart does somersaults, his stomach does twists, and he catches himself before he decides to launch himself across the table, spinning around it instead to bury his face into Nazuna's shoulder. His pulse is heavy in his ears, like the bassline in the song he'd written for them three weeks ago he hadn't seen them perform yet because Nazuna had wanted them to be <em>perfect</em> first, and he can't stop the laughter from bubbling up, up, and out. Nazuna pulls him into a better hug, and Leo sings his love song again, peppered with the laughs he thought he'd lost alongside his songwriting ability.</p>
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